Monday, May 13, 2013

Mother's Day

It's hard for me to know how to write about Mother's Day because motherhood conjures up all kinds of emotions for me.  I love my children and consider it a privilege to get to spend my days with them.  They are precious to me and I consider them both great gifts.  I often worry that their "little years" will have flown by and I'll look back one day regretting that I spent them complaining about how hard they were!

Like many other moms, I find it pretty tough to be home each day where the "schedule" is all up to me, and the days can easily go by without a whole lot of other adult interaction.  I find myself frustrated by my children's sin and by my own sin (and my inability to correct my children's sin!).  I frequently find myself discouraged that I'm not the mother I thought I'd be or that I wish I was.  {Motherhood is not the place for the perfectionists among us!}  Frankly nothing has quite humbled me and showed me my need for God like becoming a mom has.

I know that all of us come at this a little differently--no one's story (or circumstances) are quite like that of another's, but it's really important to me that people know I always told the truth about my own story.  And the truth is it has been hard and messy.  Beautiful too, yes.  But the hard times and the messy times have been real and they have shaped me.  What I need to remember to pray is that God would ultimately take the messy, the hard, and the beautiful parts of my story and use it all to shape me for His own glory.  Where I'm inclined to believe a lie that my worth is a measure of my performance, thankfully, there are very gifted writers out there who remind me that Real Womanhood isn’t a function of becoming a great mother, but of being loved by your Great Father.

My family made me feel rather special yesterday.  I got to sleep in, they made me a yummy breakfast, and on a whim I decided Japanese sounded just right for lunch.  I mean, why not?

A little hibachi action!  {The children were rather terrified!}
Beautiful peonies and a new design book for moi! 

Sweet boy with his gifts for me.

Of course, I would be remiss if I didn't thank my own mother for all of her years of selfless mothering! Now that I'm a mom myself, as I watch her continuing to mother my youngest brother in a way few of her peers are still doing, I feel for her in a way I probably couldn't before.  She doesn't have the empty nest or the ability to spontaneously make her own plans like most of us moms imagine we'll be able to do again one day. And yet, she's consistently upbeat, encouraging and ready to sacrifice her time for the needs of others.  (I'm not so sure she passed on these genes to me!!)   I am so thankful for my mom and for the friendship we have.  Sometimes I can't quite believe I'm no longer the little girl asking my mom to come tuck me in at night--instead, I'm now tucking little ones in!  Thank you for all you do, Mom.  I love you.

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